Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

Sepsis. A Silent Killer.

Mother of all Lists

unnamed-12Here’s the truth. I’d much rather bury my head in the sand about all the diseases, illnesses and accidents-waiting-to-happen that could strike the moment you walk out the door.  But, in reality its much better to be informed, which is why I’m really grateful to Leanne for sharing her experience of Sepsis:

Sepsis the silent killer.

Every year, 150,000 people in the UK develop sepsis. Of those, 44,000 die. 

  • I hope that this list can help to educate us on what a infection or kidney stones can do if left un treated.

  • In my case it led to sepsis.

  • A illness that can be fatal.

  • Here is my story of sepsis.

  • I hope it inspires you to always listen to your body. Protect it and look after it.

  • I was very ill for a few days after having kidney stones.

  • I had a very high temperature, severe shivers and chills.

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Posted in Child Free

Child Free Weekend! 👌🤗

So the weekend that just passed was the first weekend that Paul and I had been away since his birthday last year which was in May. Paul had got me a night away to the Canal Court for Christmas. This is a popular spa hotel in Newry about 30 miles away could be a bit more from where we are in Belfast.

So to make a weekend off it we had booked into a B&B just outside Carlingford in County Louth. Carlingford is a beautiful place, if you are ever in Ireland go visit this little town. It’s rich in history and nightlife definitely would not get bored there.

So I picked Paul up from work on the Friday and I yes I drove down to Newry my first big motorway drive since passing my test. Still proud as punch I am. Anyways when we got to the Canal Court we were both exhausted from our previous five kid sleepover from the night before. We were going to go out for dinner in Newry however we were told by so many people that the hotel food was delicious.

So we checked in went to our room which was lovely, clean and most off all there was no kids in sight. We had the double bed lovely ensuite and all the amenities that all hotel rooms have. However to us it felt like heaven. As we have the most uncomfortable bed ever. And I mean EVER!!! We got washed had a drink or two that we had brought with us and headed for dinner in the restaurant.

We had a good we look through the menu while sipping over another drink, a Guiness for Paul and Malibu and Coke for me. We both ordered the same meal which was like being at a little piece of Disneyworld for the first time. We both had what was called a Chuck Wagon. A fillet steak, stuffed chicken with an onion ring and garlic chips plus peppered sauce. We actually got to eat a hot meal and finish it while it was still hot. 👌

I remember walking out from dinner and seeing this big Chandler I wanted to take it home. The Canal Court have this beautiful big circle stairway from their front entrance leading up to a bar and restaurant. It was excellency at its finest for a night away!!

The tiredness was starting to kick in so we decided that we needed to get to the hot tub, sauna and steam room before we get too tired. Well for my first hot tub experience it will definitely be one I won’t forget. Sitting on the roof top of the Canal Court in a hot tub in the pouring rain. Absolute perfection!!!!

This is how tired Paul and I were instead of going back to get ready to go out. We went back to the hotel room I got in jammies and we were both in bed by half 8 with a few drinks watching a film. Before nodding off to the best nights sleep we had in a long while in the most amazing bed.

The next morning after waking up and checking on the kids. We went down for breakfast before checking out. The staff were so friendly and helpful and the food was so tasty. I could have done 2 nights there. Maybe next time.

We then went a drive to Paul’s cousins house. Who lives just outside Carlingford. It was her birthday so we called by to day hello and arranged to go out for drinks in there local later on that evening. We went to the B&B called the Walkers Nest. It was lovely and homely my first B&B and experience. It was only used really to put our heads down for the night.

We headed out to the Carlingford Arms for food which was just as scrumptious as ever. This little town is so lovely (Guys you really need to visit when in Ireland). We then headed to the local bar of Paul’s cousin called Lily Finnegan’s this was just the perfect little place for me. One very small bar with 1 room an open fire and a singer in the corner. A little piece of perfection. We drank all night which wasn’t really highly though off the next morning when having to head home early. We clearly didn’t think that one through.

Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

Dilemma!! Baby or a big wedding🤰👶-🤵👰

I have one big, huge, colossal dilemma. Paul and I are getting married next year October 3rd however for basically 8 to 9 months now I have been wanting another baby and he does too. He’s happy with whatever decision I make in timing of when to have our next bambino.

I would have another child in a heartbeat in I could and have done for the last 6 months. Although our wedding was booked last April for October next year. Paying for a wedding on maternity pay just doesn’t cut it. Especially with the amount of people we are inviting.

Although I am quite happy to cut that all back and put a Buffett on for the evening guests. Does that seem a bit harsh?

I would love to finish having children at 30. Which will be next year. It’s such a tough decision. I have no idea what to do.

If it were you, would you:

A.) Have a big wedding and make a day off it


B.) Small wedding and get pregnant so your kids are close in age.

Posted in Toddler Life

Parents!!! We have had a breakthrough! 🤗🙆

Bath time has been quite tough for the last 6-7 months. However, only with the little one. Roman my oldest loves the bath. He could stay in it for hours if you let him. Although, afterwards it’s like I have my very own swimming pool in my bathroom. The whole floor basically needs to be covered in towels just so Ruaidhrí can walk in and talk to him. (That’s probably the reason why I have never ending washing 🤔).

Anyways, our breakthrough came in the form of Ruaidhrí sitting in the bath for 10 minutes tonight. Yes you heard that right!! 10 whole bloody minutes. However, we were not meltdown free as he had one when trying to take him out of the bath. Literally for the first time in 6-7 months he did not want to get out of the bath.

I have no idea how Ruaidhrí’s dislike of the bath started. One night he was fine, the following night?! Boy I had not expierenced a meltdown like it since Roman was afraid of the bath. Although he had a genuine reason as he had fallen in the bath which scared him. With Ruaidhrí all we can do is come up with some extravagant idea… like he realised he was the offspring of the Wicked Witch from the West and would melt at the touch of water. As it boy fought tooth and nail. He would not sit down for months all he done was stand and he was in and out within a minute. No joke!!! That boy seriously hated baths for no reason. There were nights were it felt like I was losing my patience with him. As all his brother wanted to do was play in the bath when it was their bath time. Roman was loving the thought of having a playmate at bath time. I think I have a few bald spots due to the stress of bath time over the last 6-7 months with Ruaidhrí and definitely a few tears shed. Even though it seemed I didn’t look stressed inside my blood felt like it was going to burst my viens (over dramatic I know, however if you have kids you understand how stressful simple tasks can become). Now though I’m hoping and praying that this little boy 👇👇 is what bath times are all about now.

I don’t want to go overboard. But after all the hard work in listening to a meltdown, practically every single night. Persevering through it all and keeping the vision of the light at the end of the tunnel. The light finally came. Ye-fucking-ha!!!!

As it would be ironic if he didn’t like water when his dad is a swimming teacher and swam in competitions when younger.

Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

New Years Resolutions, Social Media, Pressures and Taking a Stand!

So I had just deleted my previous post I had spent  a couple of hours on over the last few days.

I am going to keep this post short and sweet as they say.

Over the new year I seen a lot of peoples Instagram stories on their resolutions. Personally I never made any this year as I always break them. Anyways back to the point! A good few of these people had said that they wanted to change how they look body shape and facial so they can fit into the world around them and feel normal.

Well how sad is this! No really! People should change because they want to change for themselves not to fit in. Society today has to many pressures on men and women to fit in. Media shows unrealistic images of celebrities, models etc… and doesn’t realise the effect it has on people’s mental health and self confidence.

We are all normal in our own way. We are not born to all be the same. We are all made to be beautiful in our own way. Our society needs to start showing positive body images of every size and type of human. We need to start talking about the taboo subject’s more. We need to make a stand!

Seeing these Instagram stories made me realise that I too was being petty. On my feed I try to cut out most of me or post photos without me. However, this year I am going to post the good, the bad and the ugly!!! As a mum I don’t get time to put my face on every day. Most days your lucky I have even brushed my hair properly. This year I am going to post a picture of me everyday. As I am a normal person and there will be days I look like I have been hit by a bus but I am still normal. I’m still the person I am with a full face of make up on and hair done.

It’s time to take a stand and show the world of media. Everyone is beautiful no matter how they look or because ofwho they are. We need to show that our world is big enough for so many different kinds of beautiful.

Posted in Mum Monday's

Mum Monday’s 👩👦👧👶

It’s that time again another Monday another Mum to share her journey through motherhood. This week we have Maura. My future sister in law 😊… 

Here is Maura’s story….

1.) When did you realise you wanted to be a mum? 

I was pregnant so young I never really thought about it before I found out. I probably found out that I wanted to be a mum when they put my baby boy in my arms.

2.)What do you remember about the day you had your child/children? How did you feel?

When Aaron was born I remember the moment he was born the song meet me half way was on the radio but I always remember thinking what if I don’t love my baby as I don’t remember ever feeling maternal but when they put him in my arms I new everything would be ok I had never felt anything like that in my life I truly was overcome with emotion and love.

When Abbie was born I remember being high as a kite on gas and air and when she was born the midwife said to me it’s a girl(I was sure I was having a boy) I that I thought she was lying to me I remember lifting her leg to check.

When sé was born I was very impatient as we had been in the hospital for a long time but 48 hour later I was finally brought to the delivery suit to get things started not that I new less than an hour later I would be holding my perfect little boy. The thing I remember the most is the doctor came in to break my waters went to write in my notes and said they would put the drip up in an hour and I just remember feeling that the baby was going to be born the doctor assured me that I could be a while as I was early. She said that she would check me I was 10cms and after the fastest part my little man was here.

3.) What did you love and hate about pregnancy? 

I loved the movement and feeling the baby get bigger and knowing my baby would be here soon. I hated most things in pregnancy I am the most impatient person I know I was never really sick but had nausea for nearly the entire time.

4.) Tell me something unique about your child or each of your children. 

Aaron was my first he was such a placid baby. He is a very caring child he is going through his really stroppy stage at the minute but he still is the most caring little boy I have ever met. Last December we all went to the Christmas market and we went to the cash machine standing beside the cash machine was a homeless man playing a tin whistle. I had given the kids 10 pound to spend at the market and Aaron asked me could he give his money to the man I explained that the money was for him to buy something for himself but he said that he has lots of toys and the little man didn’t have any dinner or anywhere to sleep and that he wanted to give his money to the man.

Abbie is everything I wasn’t as a child she loves dolls and makeup and everything girly. She is such a daddy’s girl I have never really got a look in but she looks dainty and that she would break if you touch her but she is really tough we were in funky monkeys and there was a little boy who was being really horrible to all of the kids hitting them and taking there toys then he turned round to Abbie took her glasses (Abbie is practically blind) and I was on my way over to give off to the girl working in funky monkeys when Abbie took her glasses back pushed him over and said “excuse me it is very rude to take something that doesn’t belong to you. You really need to learn some manners”. Where I would have curled up in a ball

Sé is only 6 months so his personality hasn’t truly come out in full but even when he is crying because he is hungry or tired he still smiles when you look at him

5.) What surprised you most about becoming a mum? 

The thing that surprised me the most about becoming a mum was that how much a mothers instinct clicks in I hate confrontation but when needed my confrontational issues go away. 

6.) What has been the most difficult part of being a mother?

With so many wonderful things that come with becoming a mum there are some bad aspects like lack of sleep etc but the hardest thing is the worry I have been blessed with 3 great sleeping babies but I barley slept in the early days I was so so paranoid about sleeping I kept thinking they were going to choke in there sleep I winded them to an inch of there lives but with each baby my paranoia lessened slightly.

7.) What has been the best part of being a mother? 

The best part of being a parent is the individuality of each of my children they are beautiful smart funny children that I am truly blessed to have. I love watching them hit each milestone and seeing how they grow into amazing little people but if I’m being truthfully honest I love bedtime every night knowing that the kids are safe in bed and that we have managed to keep 3 children alive for another day lol. I love knowing they feel safe and loved everyday.

8.) What do you want your children to remember about you?

The thing I want my children to remember is how much I love them and how amazing they are and that they should never doubt themselves for one second because they are the best things that ever happened to me.

Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

Mum Monday’s 

Today we have a mum sharing with us her view on her own journey through motherhood. 

I am happy to have my beautiful cousin Patrice on the blog this week answering questions on being a mama!! So here she is ❤❤❤ how stunning are these little beauties 👇… a credit to her is to say the least. I’m proud to be their Auntie.

1.) When did you realise you wanted to be a mum?

I realised I wanted to be a mum when I found out I was pregnant unexpectly in 2010, however I miscarried in which I went through alot of emotions (as you can imagine), telling myself maybe Im not ready to be a mum and thats why it happened. But life happens these things happen which took me a while to come to terms with and when I did I knew that this was what I wanted even at the young age of 21 but I felt so blessed when I found out I was pregnant with my son a few months later 😊.
2.)What do you remember about the day you had your child/children? How did you feel?

Lets just say the suspension of meeting my little guy was unbearable, I was soo excited and eager for him to be here already, however I went full term (40 weeks) then another two weeks where I was induced and then 4 days later he arrived. At first I was an emotional wreck, happy, sad, anxious about being responsible for this little human we made but then that all settles down when you see their little face. The unconditional love I have for my children when they were born is so precious and it never ends no matter how old, cheeky and funny they become. That bond I have with my children is amazing and becomes stronger and stronger everyday. 
3.) What did you love and hate about pregnancy?

Well my first 2 pregnancies were a breeze compared to my last one. If I had of had my last pregnancy first let me just tell you there would not have been another baby lol. The sickness and hospital stays I had with my third was crazy and it didnt stop until 3 weeks before I had my little girl. During this time having to work in a restuarant as a supervisor and oversee everything was hard going because the smell of the food made me feel so ill, plus being on your feet all day and the amount of toilet breaks I needed was crazy 🤣. All worth it in the end though.
4.) Tell me something unique about your child or each of your children.

All my children have different personalities, my son Elliot (my first born) is a sensitive wee soul and is very very smart (as told by many others). He enjoys talking more with adults and being able to communicate with us all as he likes to know about everything and anything which I love. My daughter Emily is the complete opposite she loves all the girly things in life and dressing like princesses but will go out and climb and swing from trees, climb walls, play in mud while dressed all nicely. Shes a wee tomboy which I love and will argue the bit out with anyone 🤣. I wouldnt have her an other way. As for Ella shes only 2 months old so it will be interesting to see how her personality shines through as she gets older. 💙💜💛
5.) What surprised you most about becoming a mum?

Everything suprised me about becoming a mum, the amount of responsibility you have for these wee lives and always striving to do my best in bringing them up with manners and how to treat others. However this is alot harder than what it seems as people and children can be so cruel nowadays its a learning process every single day for me. Also my life changed dramatically one I became a mum like yours friends start to become distant and its hard to even have a social life. However I do enjoy my nights in with the kids and even when they go to bed. I would enjoy a night out once in a while and thats only for my own sanity 🤣. Also I realised alot who has been there for me once I had my kids, alot of family members took a step back and dont make the effort with my kids. Although thats there lost!!

6.) What has been the most difficult part of being a mother?

As mentioned above finding time to be myself without the kids is so hard due to the lack of people wanting to mind the kids for me. I know they are my pride and joy but it would also be nice to go for a coffee with friends and actually get to enjoy it, an hour here or there would be nice lol. Looking after my mental health has also been hard too, somedays are better than others!
7.) What has been the best part of being a mother?

The best part of being a mother is watching my children grow into their wee personalities while reaching their milestones in life, ie: rolling over, crawling, walking, first day at nursery/school, meeting there wee friends…etc it amazing. 
8.) What do you want your children to remember about you?

I want my children to always know how much I love them and how hard I work and try to do the best I can for them by spending as much time doing things with them no matter how big or small it maybe. I would like them to always know that I am there for them no matter what even if others aren’t or can’t be. Lifes too short always make the best of any situation and stay positive.

Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

Lush Product Review: Sleepy Body Lotion

So a few weeks ago so many of my family and friends were telling me about Lush’s body lotion called ‘Sleepy that is working wonders on children that currently have not gotten the memo on how to sleep through the night (my youngest is included as one of those children).

So I thought I would jump on the bandwagon. Paul and I would give anything to have our nights back and to catch up on those much needed 😪💤. I got Paul to go down after work the other week. Looking forward to the bedtime routine, hoping and praying for that nights sleep that has long aluded us was just a few hours away. Much to my disappointment it was sold out and not just in that shop, every shop in Belfast. The queue was down the street before the shop had even opened that morning. Paul was told could be another week before anymore of the product comes in. 

My mum had been keeping an eye on Facebook just incase a batch came in. She ended up getting me two tubs a few days later. I could not wait to get started and to see what all the hype was about. 

After the first night we noticed a difference. However, we did not know that Ruaidhrí had a viral infection and was about to take full effect on him the next day. 

We carried on using the Lush Sleepy lotion through his sickness hoping that it would help him sleep a bit better. Although he was up quite regularly. Once he was over the viral infection I could not wait to see the Lush Sleepy get to work.

A week went by and his sleep was actually worse than what it was before we began using the lotion. He was up every two hours for example up at 2am back to sleep at 3am and up again at 4am. This was every night.  After about 10 days my other half said to stop using it to see how his sleep was. Straight away it started to improve and he was only waking up about 3 times but going back to sleep practically right away (well about 20mins later but that’s a lot better than 60mins).

I used the lotion on my other son Roman and on myself both of us slept brilliantly. I still use it on both of us. Sadly though it did not work on Ruaidhrí. It had the complete opposite effect on him and kept him up instead of helping him sleep.

Means I get more of the lotion to myself which smells divine seriously definitely one of the best bedtime lotions I have used on myself. Although got to say I was disappointed that it did not work for Ruaidhrí with all the hype surrounding this product and how it helped babies sleep. I guess it is true different things work for different babies. 

Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

Mum Monday’s 👩👦👶

Hello everyone this is going to be a new weekly blog post. It’s all about being a mum, mom, mother, mummy whatever you call yourself. So here we go today’s first post will be about me…

My name is Andrea Johnston. I have 2 boys Roman 5 and Ruaidhrí coming 10 months. I have officially went part time in work from today so I have more time with my children and my other half whose name is Paul.


1.) When did you realise you wanted to be a mum? 

A.) Well I didn’t realise I wanted to be a mum until I was pregnant with my first. To tell you the truth I didn’t know if I wanted children. Once I had Roman I wanted and still do a whole football team. 

2.) What do you remember about the day you had your child/children? How did you feel?

A.) My two experiences were completely different. Being in labour was the same and meeting my two boys for the first time was just the most amazing feeling I have ever felt and experienced. However, I was in two different relationships and being in labour while with my first son’s father was an experience I will never want to go through again. While with my current partner  (soon to be hubby) I felt calm even though I probably did not look it. I felt supported and protected with him by my side.
3. ) What did you love and hate about pregnancy?

A.) In all honesty I am not a big fan of pregnancy I was constantly sick, back pain which led to physio and you could have swore I was carrying twins if not triplets. Pregnancy is hard for me. Still won’t stop be having more children as I love the feeling of being able to feel your little one move around inside you. That you are growing a little human to bring into this world. I love how your love grows every single day for your child.

4.) Tell me something unique about your child or each of your children.

A.) Roman is my little butterfly who just floats by in life. He’s sensitive and loves to please everyone. Lately he’s been starting to stand up to his friends which is great to see. He loves to sing and dance. Ruaidhrí is my firecracker, his fuse was lit when he was born and still hasn’t stopped. He’s fearless and just into everything. He will get his brother into a lot of trouble.

5.) What has surprised you most about becoming a mother?

A.) For me it’s how I enjoy the mum life so much more than the single life I had. I love that I have two children to look after and raise and that I go to bed early. I love that I prefer to be at home now than out at bars or nights out. I love cuddling up on the sofa with the other half too catch up on a tv show with a cuppa and a few biscuits. I am amazed at myself for how much motherhood has changed me. It didn’t happen overnight but I definitely would not change how becoming a mother has changed me to the person I am today.

6.) What has been the most difficult part of being a mother?

A.) My anxiety after Ruaidhrí got too an all time high. I just did not want to leave the house. I was worried that something would happen to the children while we were out. It’s not as bad now but sometimes it still creeps up. Also I find dividing my time difficult. Trying to see to both kids, working and all the other things. Some days I’m like I got this shit… Wonder Woman better watch her back 😜😝… While others it’s like I’m the tortoise in the race with the hare. I’ll get there though!!

7.) What has been the best part of being a mother?

A.) I guess my answer will be the same as most parents. The best part is it all even the warts. From the day you find out your pregnant and everyday from then. Seeing their wee faces and and watch them grows from tiny little babies to the person they are today. It’s amazing to know that someone looks up and depends on me and that I will be one of their first role models.

8.) What do you want your children remember about you?

A.) I would want them to remember how much I love them. How I enjoyed spending time with them doing activities and other family fun adventures. I want them to remember that I will have tried to raise them as kind and caring human beings and to remember that. 

Posted in Mum Life / Mom Life

What #Parenting has really been like for me 

For me being a mother of one is a far stretch to being a mother of two. I know some parents have three maybe four children and family life is a breeze well that really a breeze, but a far lot calmer and less manic than mine. Well for me anyways.

Being a mother to one for me it was difficult at times from Roman was 8 months I was a single mum. I studied full time was up to all hours doing assignments and starting my day at 5.30 am most days to get to my classes on time. I loved it and wouldn’t change a single part of it for anything.

(The Mum Tum out on show ☝️)

Becoming a mother of two has changed my view of parenting. First of all Ruaidhrí’s first 9 months have been somewhat of a rollercoaster ride. This boy has not had it easy. He has been in and out of hospital, constantly being sick, his teething pains are kicking him up the butt every other day at the moment. Worse of all is his sleep. There was a time he did not sleep at all. Naps were only 20 mins twice a day and then constantly up and down throughout the night. This seemed to last for years (well maybe more like a few months) however it was slowly taking it’s toll on us.
I love being a mum, I can honestly say having my boys are the most beautiful and amazing blessing I have. My most favourite thing to do is have family time. I would pick family time over anything else and I really enjoy spending time with my family. 

However, there are days were I was just physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually drained. It was like my head was hitting a brick wall while my body was going through all the actions of every day life, looking after to young boys, a bigger loveable child (well only sometimes he’s quite sensible 90% of the time), keeping a household running and going back to work. 

Not only that I suffered from anxiety. There was a time were I did not want to leave the house. My anxiety was under control when I was in my own wee bubble. I always feared that something bad was going to happen to my boys or I would go to sleep and not wake up. I had no idea what was going on as I wasn’t depressed. I was perfectly happy being in my own bubble with my boys and my family. I didn’t like going out to public places like bars and pubs I felt like people would be judging me as I thought I should be home with my kids. At the moment these thoughts still pop into my head. I want to go home about 8 times during a night out without the kids. Crowds aren’t my thing anymore. Be that as it may, I have come to terms with that. I enjoy being at home and I am slowly realising that it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks or says, if I am happy with my life then who cares what others judgements are. However, society has made people become more conscious about how people view us. Which is totally wrong and definitely not a way that is healthy for us as humans. Mental health is on the uprise in the world we live in And in my opinion it’s mostly due to unhealthy norms that media and social media have turned into general norms that we as a society should follow. (Sorry got a little of topic there and carried away with myself.)

Being a mum of two I never realised how difficult it was going to be to split my time. Especially with the four year age gap. At the start I thought this was easy. What on earth are other mum’s on about. Then again, you forget that newborns eat, sleep and poop. (Practically sleep for most of the day for the first few weeks). So I was able to do all the Christmas activities I usually do with Roman. It wasn’t until Ruaidhrí got out of hospital and started to need a lot more attention and to be a lot more hands on. That guilt that I spoke about in a previous post. Boy!!! No one warned me about that. I went to bed crying to myself at nights as I felt so guilty as all Roman wanted to do was spend some time with me. Like people say all children are different and these two boys are like chalk and cheese. Roman is our laid back easy living boy, while Ruaidhrí is our firecracker who’s going off in the middle of a tornado.

I honestly have no idea how Paul and I have not argued or snapped at each other during these last 9 months. It has been a tough ride for the both of us and for Roman also. As our little firecracker changed the family dynamics for him also. At least I know that if we made it through what have been a very rough few months, while being so sleep deprived, working, running a household and raising two young boys. While going through every emotion possible each and every day for the last few months. Then we will make it through whatever life has to throw at us.

One outlet that has helped me through my anxiety and the choppy inharminous days that very much seemed like I was giving a Willy Wonka Everlasting Gobbstopper in the form a child that needed 24 hour constant one on one attention. This outlet was Instagram, I already had my own profile on Instagram but I made a mum profile up and a blog and started to follow other parents that made me realise I wasn’t on my own. I related to their posts, blogs and stories. I was able to read and see that other people were dealing with tge same challeneges that I was going through and we were able to talk about how we were dealing with it. It was great. It lifted me up. I was starting to feel like me again and that  it wasn’t just that I wasn’t able to be a mum of two. It made me realise I am only human and raising another human will come with many challenges some good and some demanding and difficult. These are challenges I am willing to take head on as becoming a mum as I have said has been the most amazing and unbelievable blessing that I have been given. I just did not realise how hard it was going to be. Life ain’t easy though… it’s not a walk in the park all the time and no one can ever be prepared for what parenthood brings.